spent too long on the toilet playing on my phone now my legs are asleep

spent too long on the toilet
playing on my phone now my legs are asleep  First World Problems

the crab is so raw It's still singing "under the sea"

the crab is so raw It's still singing

Research found that if you are afraid of spiders, you are more likely to find one in your bedroom. I'm really scared of Emma Watson

Research found that if you are afraid of spiders, you are more likely to find one in your bedroom. I'm really scared of Emma Watson   What are you scared of

LOVE IS ALL YOU NEED? FALSE. YOU NEED WATER AND RATIONS.

LOVE IS ALL YOU NEED? FALSE.  
YOU NEED WATER AND RATIONS.  Schrute

if you put lil wayne and lil john together would you have a full size john wayne?

if you put lil wayne and lil john together would you have a full size john wayne?  Philosoraptor

Oh, you're getting back together with your ex? I bet that will work out great this time

Oh, you're getting back together with your ex? I bet that will work out great this time  Condescending Wonka

You're telling me you have large self-refilling bowls of water and you shit in them?

You're telling me you have large self-refilling bowls of water and you shit in them?  Skeptical Third World Kid

She blinked at me 2 more times than normal So I guess you can say things are getting pretty serious

She blinked at me 2 more times than normal So I guess you can say things are getting pretty serious  Things are getting pretty serious

I'll have you know that yesterday while playing COD I was killed before I could deploy my care package and I only raged over the mic for 20 minutes

I'll have you know that yesterday while playing COD I was killed before I could deploy my care package and I only raged over the mic for 20 minutes  Tough Spongebob

Washed my hands while wearing khakis i don't look like i peed myself

Washed my hands while wearing khakis i don't look like i peed myself  Success Kid